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Living with dyspraxia

Sel, 21, recently discovered she has dyspraxia. Although she's now successfully studying for a degree at university, her undiagnosed condition caused her to struggle at school and face being incorrectly labelled as 'lazy' or 'thick'. Here's her story:

Putting all the scientifc jargon to one side, dyspraxia means that I have difficulty in getting my body to do exactly what I'd like it to do. According to the Dyspraxia Foundation, around 10% of the population is thought to have the condition, and it's a lot more common in boys than girls. There are certain traits that dyspraxic people might have, including lack of co-ordination, poor spatial awareness and an inability to concentrate.

I think being dyspraxic is like being drunk, but without having the beer goggles and the belief that you're a good dancer. The condition makes me quite clumsy, so I'm always bumping into objects and people. Sometimes, doing simple things like threading a needle can be difficult. I can't ride a bike and I even have trouble keeping my balance standing on sloping ground.

My levels of concentration are never very good, especially if there's background noise that can distract me. Following and understanding conversations can be difficult, although it's reading that I find particularly hard. Putting a transparent, grey plastic sheet over the text helps me to concentrate on the words as it takes the glare off of the paper.

Struggling at school

Having such a short attention span meant that keeping up with school lessons was difficult. Also, I was the only person in my year who wasn't allowed to use a fountain pen because my handwriting was so bad. This really knocked my confidence. I normally got lower grades than my friends due to my handwriting being so untidy, or the fact I had difficulty putting ideas into words. This was frustrating because although dyspraxia can make my speech slurry at times, I was usually good at speaking in class. Since my condition wasn't recognised until after I'd left school, everyone just thought I was 'lazy' or 'thick' when in fact I'm naturally a hard worker.

"I think being dyspraxic is like being drunk, but without having the beer goggles and the belief that you're a good dancer."

Overall, school wasn't exactly a pleasant experience for me. As well as coping with the symptoms of dyspraxia, I had very low self-esteem, was bullied and found it hard to relate to most of the other pupils because I had more mature interests. PE lessons were a particular nightmare because people would laugh at my lack of coordination. I was always picked last for school sports teams and, understandably, I dreaded sports day. I still can't jump a hurdle!

Getting help

The special needs department at my sixth form college helped me out a few times when I had trouble reading and understanding work, but I didn't get the full support I needed because my condition hadn't yet been diagnosed. I just felt like a hypochondriac.

My dyspraxia was eventually diagnosed when I was 20. I don't think I would've spent most of my childhood thinking I was a freak and withdrawing from social situations if I'd have known about it earlier. I might have achieved way more academically, too.

I never really considered myself intelligent enough for higher education, but finding out that I had dyspraxia helped me because suggestions were given to me about university degrees that would suit my intelligence and interests as well as my dyspraxic traits. I'm now studying for a degree in Human Rights and Politics, and I receive an hour of extra support every week at university from a tutor who helps me to develop the necessary skills for writing and structuring essays, as well as working with special computer software that helps me to read and concentrate better.

My advice for other dyspraxics

It's understandable to feel frustrated and misunderstood as a dyspraxic, so try to find an outlet for all the thoughts and feelings that you find hard to express. Personally, I like to write poetry, and I also find photography therapeutic. Others might find the medium of music or drawing better; I am yet to meet a dyspraxic who isn't intelligent. I've learned that it's important to say to yourself, "I'm going to attempt this obstacle at my own pace," rather than "I'm not going to attempt this obstacle at all because my dyspraxia gets in the way."


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