I've got to get out of here
Question
My parents don't let me out enough. They're not exactly overprotective but they think as it's my GCSE year I have to stay home and work. This is the first time I've ever felt like I need more freedom though, and all my friends can stay out much later. My mum doesn't understand my need to 'hang out' with my friends, and if I do go out, it has to be to do something productive. What should I do?
Answer
It sounds like you and your parents are in the midst of a powerful, and very frustrating, tug of war; they want you to stay in and work your butt off so that you'll achieve good GSCE results whilst you want to go out with your friends and have a good time. It's likely that they feel as if you're not taking your GCSEs seriously enough and you feel as if they don't want you to have any fun in life.
Whilst you both have perfectly valid viewpoints it's totally understandable, and 100% normal, that you need more freedom right now. After all, this is the age where you're moving from adolescence to adulthood. They, on the other hand, are thinking of your future and the importance of your exams on that future.
You need breathing room to see yourself as a separate individual from your parents but it sounds like your parents' hold on you is beginning to feel too tight for comfort. From your parents' perspective, they want you to succeed in life and are afraid that if they loosen their vice-like grip on you, you'll become an out-of-control party animal. What you need to do, then, is to assure them that you have no intention of screwing up your GCSEs; you want to do well, and you will.
In order to get them on your side, you will need to prove to them you have the capability and the will to work hard and get good results. Stay in one night and really put the pedal to the metal. Show them what you've worked on, and take the time to explain it to them. Once they see you're not in danger of burning out and neglecting the rest of your life at the expense of your work, it's very likely they'll breathe a sigh of relief and let you have the freedom you deserve.
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Question answered by Our Relationship Advisors
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